Difference between revisions of "Talk:Come to the Wired"
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:Perhaps it could be a little longer, but I am liking the structure. I think ending the story at the ''"I let it all go."'' (basically leaving out the "aftermath") might have a nice, strong impact. --[[User:アラベスク|アラベスク]] 15:07, 19 December 2012 (UTC) | :Perhaps it could be a little longer, but I am liking the structure. I think ending the story at the ''"I let it all go."'' (basically leaving out the "aftermath") might have a nice, strong impact. --[[User:アラベスク|アラベスク]] 15:07, 19 December 2012 (UTC) | ||
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| + | :: I do like the idea of that being the end. Maybe slip a mental invite to Lain earlier into the last paragraph?[[User:Bytor|Bytor]] 22:33, 19 December 2012 (UTC) | ||
::One place I could see lengthening it is to maybe have some content as she decides to go to the Wired. I don't think she would be in a state to just jump right away, so maybe some more debating it, finding out what is involved, getting convinced? I do like what is here, and I think it will work well as a sort of intro, first story for the collection- lengthening it to much may ruin that "prelude" feel. [[User:Bytor|Bytor]] 22:20, 19 December 2012 (UTC) | ::One place I could see lengthening it is to maybe have some content as she decides to go to the Wired. I don't think she would be in a state to just jump right away, so maybe some more debating it, finding out what is involved, getting convinced? I do like what is here, and I think it will work well as a sort of intro, first story for the collection- lengthening it to much may ruin that "prelude" feel. [[User:Bytor|Bytor]] 22:20, 19 December 2012 (UTC) | ||
Revision as of 22:33, 19 December 2012
There's no music designed into it right now - it's probably too short to warrant many tracks anyway, and in the spirit of Lain, most of the sounds are noise.
Does anyone think it's too short or paced strangely or anything? I might expand on some of those scenes, perhaps add some more dialogue... This story would be more suited to NVL mode, where the text fills the whole screen rather than just a box at the bottom, I think. Amysteriousgal 16:13, 15 December 2012 (UTC)
I still have the impression that something needs to be added to this one. It seems empty. Amysteriousgal 13:12, 19 December 2012 (UTC)
- Perhaps it could be a little longer, but I am liking the structure. I think ending the story at the "I let it all go." (basically leaving out the "aftermath") might have a nice, strong impact. --アラベスク 15:07, 19 December 2012 (UTC)
- I do like the idea of that being the end. Maybe slip a mental invite to Lain earlier into the last paragraph?Bytor 22:33, 19 December 2012 (UTC)
- One place I could see lengthening it is to maybe have some content as she decides to go to the Wired. I don't think she would be in a state to just jump right away, so maybe some more debating it, finding out what is involved, getting convinced? I do like what is here, and I think it will work well as a sort of intro, first story for the collection- lengthening it to much may ruin that "prelude" feel. Bytor 22:20, 19 December 2012 (UTC)
- Now that I think about it more, if anything were added, it probably should be pretty short; the way this is written (and SEL itself), is very efficient and compact when it comes to dialogue. Just enough to get rid of that "ok, why is she just killing herself?" feeling that the method of entering the Wired can give.Bytor 22:22, 19 December 2012 (UTC)
- One place I could see lengthening it is to maybe have some content as she decides to go to the Wired. I don't think she would be in a state to just jump right away, so maybe some more debating it, finding out what is involved, getting convinced? I do like what is here, and I think it will work well as a sort of intro, first story for the collection- lengthening it to much may ruin that "prelude" feel. Bytor 22:20, 19 December 2012 (UTC)
Do we maybe want to do this so that the first time you launch the VN, it does a basic options screen, then jumps straight to this VN? Then, each subsequent launch goes to the title screen. Assuming ren'py supports this, of course. Bytor 22:31, 19 December 2012 (UTC)
